Between Us

 

Mother's Epilepsy a Heavy Burden to Young Son

By Michael Coleman
Special to between us

When Jackie Geisler realizes her epilepsy is a burden to her young son, she tries to find ways to help him and other children in his situation through her local Foundation affiliate.

Jackie Geisler's life-long odyssey with epilepsy has taken yet another tumultuous turn.

This time, however, it's not about hospital stays, broken bones or lost employment because of her seizures, as has happened in the past. It's about her 11-year-old son, Shane, and the devastating affects her epilepsy has had on him.

"All of a sudden I woke up one day and it hit me like a ton of bricks," said the 36-year-old Pennsylvania resident. "I was so caught up in myself, worrying about my epilepsy, that I didn't realize the enormous stress and strain he was under because of my seizures."

The pressure was compounded by the fact that when Jackie's seizures returned with a vengeance four years ago, only Shane, then seven, was with her.

"Here I was, recently divorced, suffering seizures in my home and Shane was the only one with me," recalled Jackie. "Can you imagine what that must be like in the eyes of a child, watching you mother have seizures?"

By His Mother's Side

Shane was by her side, again, when she suffered four of the worst seizures she has ever had, all within a two-hour span. The jerking motion in one was so severe she pulled her shoulder from its socket and, later, broke her arm. She was rushed to the hospital and subjected to a battery of tests. Exhausted, she lapsed into a three-day coma.

"How do you measure the impact of this on a child?" she said.

Shane's well-being continued to gnaw at Jackie upon her return from the hospital.

"He grew up really fast," she said. "He learned to cook and clean and did other things I wasn't capable of doing by myself."

Taking on a Heavy Burden

Although her mother moved in to help, Jackie noticed that her son was still taking on a heavy burden. He was constantly checking up on her, she recalled, making sure she was not alone. He would call from his father's home and would make his way to pay phones on school property to check in with her.

"He's supposed to be a kid," said Jackie. "He had taken on too much. Epilepsy had affected my life since I was 18 months old but now it was affecting his life. It just wasn't right."

As Jackie's recovery progressed, so too did her desire to seek help for Shane. She proceeded to talk with counselors and psychologists but to no avail.

"I was told he was fine, well-rounded, and to stop being an over-protective mother," Jackie said. "Yet, they weren't living with him."

Importance of Talking to Peers

Although family members, teachers and friends have talked to Shane about his mother's epilepsy, Jackie believes her son would get the greatest benefit if he could talk to peers coping with the same issue.

"I know my child is not alone," said Jackie. "He and other children like him are hurting and need help."

Today, re-married and seizure free for 15 months, Jackie and the Epilepsy Foundation of Western Pennsylvania are discussing ways to support Shane and other children like him.

"It's very exciting," said Jackie. "A support group for children and youths in similar situations may prove to be a great benefit for these kids. I'm sure many parents see themselves and their kids in this story. I hope something good can come out of it."

Editor's note: This article originally appeared in the Spring 2001 issue of Interaction, a publication of the Epilepsy Foundation of Western & Central Pennsylvania.

Return to between us Frontpage

View the Current Issue of between us